Can You Identify This Crazy Cruiser?

Crazy Cruiser

Here’s a car that I bet few of you have ever seen. That’s because only five were ever built. It was designed in the late seventies, it cost more than a Ferrari 308, and it had a top speed of 125mph! Any guesses as to what it could be? Keep reading for the answer. Thanks goes to Doug M. for the submission!

1980 Kanzler Coupe

It is a 1980 Kanzler Coupe and it’s currently listed for sale here on eBay. This unique machine was designed by Ernie Kanzler Jr. who was a distant relative to Edsel Ford. Not sure how that gives you credibility, but it must have given them motivation. The engine came from a Cougar, the chassis from a Lincoln, and the body was based off an Opel. See the resemblance? There were some odd cars being constructed during this same time period, but this could have been the king of them all!

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Comments

  1. Brian C Member

    Now I know exactly what to do with my Opel GT!

  2. BILL GRAHAM

    I think I saw something like that in a bad dream once!..

    Like 1
  3. Charles

    That’s interesting!

  4. randy

    Yep, I also see the GT hiding under all of that….whatever it is.

  5. Stuart

    I saw the Opel GT before I read the details…but the rest of it? Yikes, the perils of steroids!!

  6. David Frank David Member

    $105K? There were lots of folks building cars in the 1970s, many based on the Lincoln Chasis, so what makes this thing so valuable? Here’s one from the museum that needs to be sold. Who knows what it might be worth, perhaps a tenth of the asking for this Kanzler?

    • jaygryph

      That looks like a variant of the Gazelle that several builders stamped out in the 70’s. I have one, though overall slightly different in design than that in subtle ways, that would normally be pinto or VW powered but currently has a Toyota 20R and 5 speed as it’s powerplant. It cost me around $1800 to winch it from the garage it’d been parked in for a decade. Luckily they’re pretty light weight since it slid one tire all the way onto the trailer.

      Fun car tho, can hardly wait to get that back on the road!

    • 57Wayne

      David, is that a Squire?

  7. e55

    Opel gt

  8. tirefriar

    the builders of the Kanzler should be charged with multiple offenses: poor taste, inflicting undue stress, indecent exposure and the main one: mutilating a real sports car! $105k??!! They should pay that in restitution…

  9. Bob

    I’m surprised five were made. Apparently nobody looked at the first one before they built the others.

  10. sunbeamdon

    What’s a Couger???

    Without looking at the answer, I thought it was a long-lost relative of the Bizzarini!

    Fuggly comes to mind!

    • Doug M

      had a work colleague years back named Don and he was into Sunbeams…..Cent. Pa. apololgies if your not him!

  11. MiniCooperMk1

    The only cheesy styling cue they missed was the Duesenberg-style exhaust pipes. Poor little Opel GT…

  12. That Guy

    It makes perfect sense that Liberace owned one. I’ve always wondered if his taste for over-the-top gaudiness was for real, or if he was in on the joke and just having fun being Las Vegas in human form.

    But I just can’t imagine anyone taking this car seriously, ever. It’s an amusing rolling laugh track, but only at a what-the-hell-I’ll-take-it price.

  13. Dolphin Member

    The latest issue of Road & Track is their “design” issue, and the best commentray in the issue is by Bob Lutz. His point is that the chief of design at any car company should make the highest salary, higher than the CEO. That’s almost never the case, but it should be because good design is necessary for building appealing cars that people will want to buy.

    I’m guessing that the guy who designed this car had a real low salary.

  14. randy

    Come on guys, it’s not all that bad, this could be some widows’ car, and her husband absolutely loved it. They’d take cruises over the mountain and look out over the city on moonlit nights.

    • Bob

      They should have pushed it over the side.

  15. Mark E

    Okay, looking at it from the rear I can see the Opel GT in the windows and particularly in the vents above the rear window. But if I look at the front I stick to my story about Glastron looking for a way to repurpose their boat molds…

    • Chuck Foster Chuck F 55chevy

      Mark E got it right, you’ve heard of boat tail cars, this one’s a boat nose, inverted with goofy headlights, doesn’t match the Opel GT curvy body at all. It looks like a schizophrenic Phantom Corsair, the front clip is on LSD. The faux running boards between the front and rear fenders look like they were molded from little blow up balloons clowns use to make animals, they have kinks in them. It’s rare, only 5 made because the builder realized no one wanted to buy a butt ugly car. You could improve the appearance by getting rid of the center lower lights, (fog lights?) and scallop behind them, curve the front end to match the GT curves, no angular center point/boat bow, make it look a little like a XKE. I think they added a zero, 10,500 is about right.

  16. Matt Tritt

    I remember this. A penilmobile! The stretch version.

  17. MikeW

    I hope it’s not the Bobcat engine, maybe a 302 or better yet the 351. OK, I looked and it’s the 351. http://blog.hemmings.com/index.php/2014/10/21/from-the-archives-kanzler-coupe/

  18. Cassidy

    The outriggers look like they are fiberglass, so its worth the risk to take down the boat ramp. If it floats, great, I hope it comes with paddles. If it sinks, even better!

  19. Chris A.

    “The Donald” needs this car.

  20. roger pence

    This reminds of some of the model cars I built as a kid. I had a period where I slapped fat fenders on every model I made. They were poorly conceived and the execution always left a lot to be desired. Just like this abomination!

  21. Matt Tritt

    Most definitely.

  22. splod

    Automobile Abomination

  23. Blindmarc

    Another that someone think “rare” = $. No demand for this = no money.

  24. Rex Kahrs Member

    I was going to say Tatra-calibur.

  25. Tim

    Some cars are rare for a pretty clear reason

  26. brakeservo

    Best argument I ever saw about the dangers of cocaine . . .

    • SoCal Car Guy

      …or eating too much canned chili with beans and washing it down with a couple six-packs of PBR.

  27. Andrew S Mace Member

    Finally — a truly awful limited production car that wasn’t built around a Spridget tub! ;)

  28. z1rider

    That is the love child of an Opel GT and a Daimler Dart. Evidently before abortion was legal.

  29. jim s

    listing has ended.

  30. Steve

    Looks like it just escaped from the circus.

  31. Vince Habel

    Should have left the Opel GT alone.

  32. josh h

    Grotesque comes to mind. Hard to look at. So ugly it hurts my feelings.

  33. Daymo

    I thought it was a Renault Alpine at first. There are certainly a few resemblances!

  34. Dave Wright

    I thought so too at first glance

  35. Barry T

    What a crime and a shame to do this to an Opel GT, which was a rather nice little car.

  36. Doug M. (West Coast) Member

    BAD DESIGN!! Almost ruined my breakfast! The back isn’t all that bad, but the front reminds me of some mud dobber lizzard with weird eyes! And from any angle, all I can see is appendages stuck onto an Opel GT! Bad!

  37. Mitch

    There is a 911 body in there somewhere.

  38. D. King

    I thought I saw 911 in there, too. The Opel GT was the poor man’s Porsche, back in the day…

  39. Italia 227

    That is the thirteen ugliest cars I’ve ever seen.

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