If you have attempted to sell anything lately on Marketplace or even craigslist, you know how had it has gotten. The automatic responses that Facebook allows people to send has brought out the worst of the worst as it relates to tire kickers. It is difficult to have a conversation with anyone worth your time, unless you are selling something truly exceptional. When it comes to vehicles, no one wants to pay the asking price – literally, no one. That’s why we can understand the seller of this 1997 Chevrolet Suburban going slightly off the rails here on craigslist to emphasize both the asking price and some of the finer points of the GMT400 platform. Thanks to Barn Finds reader Mark P. for the submission and the laugh.
You can read the ad yourself to get the gist of why we felt it was so noteworthy. Also, as someone who lived in New England for many years, Gloucester is about as perfect of a setting as you can envision for a listing of this nature. Regardless, let’s talk a little about the GMT400 platform: over the years, the Big 3 let their truck models get quite long in the tooth, using foundations that stretched back to the 70s as the basis of their modern designs. When Dodge overhauled the Ram and introduced the wildly popular trucks that debuted in the mid 90s, it the clean sheet design was transformative. While the Suburban and related models represented more of an evolutionary refresh, the updates ushered in new levels of daily driver comfort.
The Suburban may look dated now, but at the time, the improvements in comfort, convenience, and features were significant. The engines, transmissions, and chassis were all dramatically improved. I saw a forum post a few years back that captured perfectly the abstract qualities of the updates in the GMT400 platform when compared to the previous era of models like the Suburban: the older truck was fine for driving around town, but you didn’t look forward to a 400 mile trip on the interstate. Trucks like this 1997 Suburban are rigs you can use in practically any situation, and that evolution has continued with the current generation models that are used every day like your grandmother used to drive a Volvo.
The seller’s truck features a variety of desirable options, like 3rd-row seats and rear barn doors. The 5.7L 350 V8 is said to run well, and it’s hooked up to the original 700R4 transmission with overdrive. From what I’ve read, this is a decent transmission with some issues that are generally addressed by dropping the pan and changing the fluid and filter, but you definitely don’t want to make the mistake of towing in overdrive. Aside from that, this transmission should be serviceable, but seeing that hitch on the back would prompt me to ask how much towing the seller did (if I dared to question his stewardship of this fine 4×4.) Please, whatever you do, don’t offer this individual a penny less than $12,598.
Even if the truck was half the price, I wouldn’t deal with a seller like that.
Yeah, what a jerk! As if this THING is worth $12,598 dollars!
Surprised even Craigslist put something like that on their listings.
I was thinking the same exact thing. I know I wouldn’t even bother calling.
A bombastic UPPER CASE jerk
Wow. CL Listing drafted for catharsis, sent by stupidity.
Things that make you go, Hmmm.
Had to go read it for myself after seeing the previous comments. I really want to point out all the oddities, but why bother. Hard to believe Francisco is serious about selling it.
This guy is a real IDIOT.!!!
Seems similar to the conversation overheard outside a back alley tire store in West Sacramento-at one point the guy sees a cop car passing by and screams at them that yes he’s got an 8 Ball so f**ing what?
He succeeded in getting their attention at that point..
Sounds like Better living thru chemicals philosophy type attitude with this seller.
Foul laden ad, not even worthy of posting on this great website Lavery 🚮
Totally disagree. Best laugh of the morning!
Thanks, Jeff!
I’ll confess and admit that I get a little “snarky” in my comments here but with an attempt for humor. The guy posting his add on CL is beyond offensive. Unfortunately his expressed attitude seems to becoming somewhat of a social norm with a certain subgroup of people these days. Sad.
Posting while drunk.
Having grown up on the North Shore of Boston where Gloucester is located I don’t lay claim to this clown’s derogatory language or demeanor at all but that’s what you get when you “pay for an ad” on CL – you say what you want! Now…that said I would NEVER a touch a vehicle from New England because of the salt conditions on the road in the winter months and given this was probably used to tow boats back and forth between marinas in the area one can also assume it also has the ever pungent aroma of cigarette smells in it as well. Hard pass!
As they say, buy the seller, not the car. That tells you not to respond here.
Well, I must be blankety blank-hole, because I think the price is way too high.
Wow!! Wow!! Boston area must be Irish!! Would not surprise me one bit. I have relatives like this would not be surprised again if we were related! 🤨 they must listen to Dropkick Murphy!! 😄
Oh, you must mean the Dropkick Murphys? Which, by the way, are a phenomenal band.
Ego maniac with an inferiority complex! I think I’ll send him a message asking if it’s still available.
When you do, I double-dog dare you to offer $12,597!
Way overpriced, that’s the root of the problem. About 1/2 the asking price is more realistic. It isn’t even the more desirable early-2000’s model that came with the LS engines. The trees in the background suggest it’s been for sale since summer, rather than be angry, maybe reassess your ad.
By losing his cool, he’s inviting people with nothing better to do to start messing with him as a form of entertainment.
Steve R
Jeff, I don’t think it’s four wheel drive. I had a 95 and a 98 back in the day, both 4WD. They had the transfer case shifter on the transmission tunnel hump right in front of the console. This one doesn’t have it. Two wheel drive and 200K miles in the rust belt makes it something most people won’t want even it this clown and his price were decent.
I did run into a seller one time who told me “Don’t offer me a dollar less, I’ll get mad.” He was selling a real 69 Z/28 Camaro (this was 1982) for $2450, so I told him I want it and I’ll pay $2500 if it makes you feel better. He never said why for sure, but I got the idea that his wife would nag him if he didn’t get back the money he paid for it in the sale. It was the best money I ever spent and I still have it 44 years later.
Joe it is an electronic shift 4wd. I can see the buttons on the dash, lower right of the steering wheel. I’ve owned a 98 Yukon and two 97-98 Sierras and a 98 Silverado K1500. One of the Sierras had a floor shift 4wd, the rest had these bottoms.
Having said that I think this is a joke add. It’s to troll people. The duct taped taillight, stickers over rust on back bumper and generally dirty interior (not cleaned up to sell) tells me this is literally a $2500 truck in this market. Don’t get too fired up over it. I see better ones everyday for less money.
And these are good trucks as you can see from my ownership experience. – Peace.
wow what a colorful add, my elderly neighbors just sold theirs for $3500 bucks better taken care of and only 180k miles. almost makes me want to blow up this guy’s contact info with ones listed cheaper but i dont want them getting my contact info.
I know first hand that New Englanders are VERY opinionated, but this guy, he drops more F-bombs than I do! And if you delete all of them, his ad would be much shorter and wouldn’t have a damned thing to
say. Note to seller: Now that you’ve alienated anyone wanting
to buy what you have by yelling and streaming profanity online, just go ahead, fix the fuel line, and be ready to keep your truck
for a good long while. After all,
profanity is just an empty mind
trying to express itself.
I loved the ad. You know what you are getting into. Needless to say the poor guy has been subjected to the never ending low ballers that rifle silly offers. We have all been there at some point. And having lived in that area before, The f this and f that is kinda part of the language. It cracked me up. And if you read it with that POV, I bet he is a fun guy
You’ve got to be kidding. Living in that area must have damaged your brain corpsuckles.
What are “corpsuckles”???
Corpsuckles sound way nastier than anything this seller said-
Corpsuckles are that part of your brain that processes inputs from your gill strings and eye strobes to transfer what you hear and see into brain farts.
Never ending low ballers could be correlated to an excessively high price. Many owners think their P-O-S is a Pot-Of-Gold. Lately, I’ve been seeing a lot of FIRM price warnings that don’t warrant it upon inspection. When the subject of negotiation is brought up, the seller balks, only to reduce the price in the ad a few days later. IMO, the seller can be as much of a problem as the buyer.
Ad is good for a laugh, kind of…. but let’s face it, it’s not going to help sell this car is it? The only mitigation is that I can understand the frustrations of selling an older, relatively low value car via craigslist. You do get swamped with a lot of idiots, scammers, low-ballers and sketchy dishonest people contacting you… I’ve done it a few times and it’s always a pain, you just have to suck it up, weed through all the cr@p and there will be a real buyer out there among all the nonsense…
So, maybe this seller has just endured some bad seller experiences, and this ad is a knee-jerk reaction? Still, wrong approach. 99.9% of potential buyers are just going to say “hard pass” on this one, don’t want to deal with that attitude.
Seriously? I even checked out the address to see if this was real and I’ll Be Dipped, there it sits on Google Maps Street View in all its glory and splendor. Poor nay-bahs!
The ad is snarky, but it does spotlight a problem with the average buy/selling site. I have experienced the awful side of humanity i.e. the no shows, low ball buyers etc. While the seller does nothing to solve the problem with his ads demeanor, he did echo what I have thought while trying to be a patient seller ; )
Not a bad vehicle tho’, just a crap ad presentation ….
As soon as I saw the duct tape holding the taillight in place I knew a trip to Gloucester is in my future
I love the pink accessories and aqua blue spray-painted parts, oh, and the nice orange spray painted hitch.
Wow,a real tough guy !
Well, I had to see this ad for myself after reading all your comments. Definitely has anger issues and I would recommend some couch time for this guy! 🤪
you want to talk about somebody with an anger problem then this is the guy. this will never sell at his price. it is 4wd has the button on the dash not a manual engage style. i had a 95 i bought new drove 250k.had to all the brake and fuel lines and a lot of other work. the truck still looked new inside and out when i sold it 5yrs ago for 4500.00. this guy has the b***s to ask 12.500 and the truck is loaded with rust and duct tape then curse you out before you even pick up the phone. this dude really needs to put in his place. i cannot believe that that ad was even allowed to be posted
To those saying they’re surprised the ad was permitted to be posted; I envy your apparent sheltered innocence. Unfortunately, there are few platforms left on the internet that don’t allow people to basically say whatever they want. The internet is a cesspool. You can’t watch a seemingly innocent YouTube video these days without encountering tons of swearing. With no prior warning or ratings. Having said that, CL may have an option to report an ad like that.
This is what kids are growing up on and part of the reason why society is the way it is. But, that’s the way it’s going to stay because, you know, people need their freedom of..
….
Guys. I love your comments, I really can’t add anything. It might be worth the price of admission, just to talk with this jerk. Who knows maybe he is really a real nice guy with no social skills….probably not.
Someone ought to let him know he needs a new F$%#ing tail light assembly.
I’m wondering if the pin hole in the fuel line results in a fireball that completely torches is thing, if the inurance company will pay him $12,598?
I think this clown dropped F bombs than Nicky in Casino. Way over priced pile of crap probably with a rotted frame.
I’m afraid that the F bomb just doesn’t have the same shock value as it used to. People now use it as an alternative to having to think of actual words to express themselves. And you have to admit that the F word can be used for anything from a modifier to a noun or verb simply by adding or altering a few letters. How versatile. However, perhaps this seller has flipped out because of their past experience with these platforms. As anyone who has attempted to sell something on CL or FBM knows; it’s rife with lowballers, tire kickers, no shows and all manner of other rude behavior. Although this unfortunate state of affairs doesn’t condone the level of profane, unbridled anger exhibited in this advertisement; some sympathy for the devil may be due. The real irony here is that at his inflexible and unrealistic asking price; he needn’t worry about any rational buyer contacting him. He will be avoided as if he had the bubonic plague. Also I have a random thought. How do we really know that the seller is a man? Like what’s up with the pink seatbelt and steering wheel covers? And what man paints a hitch and trailer ball such hideous colors? I think some female owns this. Some of the women today can rumble with the best of malcontents. I know from personal experience. I strongly recommend not accidentally crossing vehicular paths with a certain gender segment of road warriors that roam the streets and live by the mantra of GTFOOMW. Thanks BF for the chuckle of the day and presenting me with one of the most bizarre advertisements I have ever seen.
I just saw the ad – WHY IS HE YELLING?
Its what he still owes on it lol!!!
Hahahahaha!
Yeah but how much will you take for it? LOL!!
I love this guy
So, the roof racks help make it, “…a pleasure to drive.” I’m glad he let me know that up front because that was one of my top 3 concerns!