As a child of the seventies and eighties, I often feel that kids of this generation will never experience the fun, freedom, and danger around every corner that children of my era enjoyed. Seeing motorized toys like this Chrysler Sno Runner for sale on Facebook Marketplace in ever sunny Portage, Wisconsin, I am beginning to formulate the idea that the adults were trying to kill us with such awesome contraptions as three wheelers, motorized skis, Slip N Slides, and Lawn Darts. If they weren’t engaged in negligent homicide, were the adults just using things like this 25 MPH ski to ensure the survival of the fittest? Thanks go to Lothar…of the Hill People for providing us with this interesting relic of the past to help us ponder life’s mysteries.
Coming from an era when every parent’s battle cry was “I brought you into this world, and I’ll take you out of it” could make you think that the parents were indifferent to your survival. Questioning their logic could be a dangerous exercise in itself. Remember how the Spartans used to leave babies they thought weren’t fit out in the elements to ensure that only the strongest survived? Pondering my childhood, and that of my friends and relatives, I wonder if that is a trait of many warrior cultures. Our country was engaged in the great Cold War with the Soviet Union, and warriors would be needed when the commies poured through the Fulda Gap. Our parents must have instinctually known that the weak had to be weeded out.
To start with, car seats for kids and helmets for anything other than the manly sport of football were a rarity. Maybe if Santa brought you a really fast go-cart or one of those nifty three wheelers from Honda, your parents might have brought home a helmet with the structural integrity of a broken eggshell that was thrown in by a salesman eager to get rid of a cheap customer. Of course, the helmet would be disregarded after the first ride. The parents didn’t seem to care. Most of them were holding a beer or a mixed drink on Christmas morning anyway. Christmas afternoon too. Oh, and don’t forget the egg nogg at grandmas in the evening. No car seat in sight either way. I distinctly remember sitting on the arm rest or laying in the package tray during such trips.
The toys they gave us on Christmas morning were fraught with danger and political incorrectness. We all know about Lawn Darts, but do you remember the bicycles that were styled to mimic the best rides of the Hell’s Angels? Clackers were basically a string with two hard plastic balls on either end. No way those could ever be used in anger. The most popular stuff was based on the movies of the time. I had a Smokey and the Bandit truck and Trans Am combo that likely saw more miles on the living room floor than Snowman’s rig itself. Never mind the fact that the story was about bootlegging Coors Beer, every boy worth his salt in the South wanted to be the Bandit. If he could jump a washed-out bridge, the neighborhood ditch shouldn’t be any problem. Casts were a regular thing in my grade school classrooms. Of course, parents could afford a trip to the emergency room back before medicine became so insanely expensive.
While Sno Runners were never seen in the land where palm trees sway, I can guarantee you that more than a few of these were given to northern kids at Christmastime. They were sold in Chrysler dealerships in an era where Chrysler management had a “throw everything against the wall and see what sticks” mentality. Too bad so many of their offshoots from the core business of making cars were unprofitable. Our friends at Hemmings have provided an impressive write-up concerning the history and failings of this showroom doodad. My guess is that a lot of these ended up under Christmas trees after they were thrown in with a deal on a new but already rusting Mopar. The fact that they were dog slow from the factory due to having an over-restricted muffler probably didn’t help with sales. The good news was every kid from kindergarten up knew how to rout out a muffler on a two-stroke engine to make it both louder and faster. Off to dad’s Craftsman toolbox, then hello thrills!
So, in hindsight, I guess we were lucky to live such an unprotected childhood. It made us tough, or at least we believe that. I do look back and cherish those moments, missing those who have passed and lamenting for a simpler time where fun didn’t have to pass through the scrutiny of hundreds of corporate lawyers. Things like the Sno Runner would never make it off the drawing board today, but I am glad that such things were built, and the adults let us have our fun with them.
Do you have a dangerous toy Christmas memory? Tell us about your brushes with death in the comments.
I’d swear that every one of these has come up for sale in
the last year.I wonder how many of the original owners lived
a long life?
I would think they sold a most of them to Rednecks –
“Hold my beer & watch this”
Well, when I prattle on like this, it’s called “bloviation”, yet okay for a writer. THAT person, who hopefully moved on, can’t appreciate a well written piece. I try, but pale in comparison to the writers. They don’t have an axe to grind, I do. Anyway, like the Simpsons reference( Bart refused to wear a helmet on the soap box derby episode), but common sense, whatever THAT is, should dictate, anything over 10 mph should have one. When I wiped out on my bicycle, it’s the 1st thing the ER asked, did you have a helmet. I said no, but kind of wish I had. I still don’t, but just go slower now, as the memory of grinding my shoulder into the gravel is still fresh. THAT was $1200 bucks, that they didn’t do anything. Luckily, Medicare picked up the tab.
I thought for sure this was a “Scotty G” post, they are having a heck of a time where he is, and he has a SnoRunner too, except, with the snow they are getting, it deems this practically useless. For a hard packed trail, it would be a gas. The author strayed a bit, and originally was intended for the military, but never made the final cut. Made in my hometown, kind of, Hartford, Wis. in the old KIssel/ West Bend-Chrysler outboard plant, I reckon every worker there had one, but outside of Wisconsin, it didn’t sell. Classic swing and a miss.
Thanks, Jeff!
Powered by an under seat, portable hair dryer?
Nice one, Jeff and Lothar! For $1,000, even though it needed work (it’s missing a few pieces and is sold now), this was probably a good deal if it even remotely functioned. Some of them have recently sold for anywhere from $3,000 to $7,500, believe it or not. Most parts are available through SnoRunner.com (I’ve ordered from there in the past) and they’re pretty interesting little vehicles. They come apart so you can stick them in the trunk, drive to a trail, and put it back together again. I start mine every once in a while, even though it’s not mosquito season. That cloud of blue smoke brings me back to the era that Jeff talks about – when companies could and would almost sell anything. “K-Tel Chainsaw Toss! Fun for all ages!”
Happy Holidays, all!
“Those were the days my friends, we thought they’d never end”
When we were kids, we rode dirt bikes. Every day, for years, starting out on Honda 50’s and 70’s, up to snarling 250 two strokes. Sans helmets. And we’re still here. Laughing at the nanny goat hand wringers that put kelvar armour on their kids, when they play on a swingset.
I honestly disagree with the overall point of this posting. Yes, I grew up in the 60’s/70’s and had a “self-managed childhood” with plenty of opportunities to kill myself. Luckily I survived, others were less fortunate. I had a cousin who sat in his mom’s lap when they got into a not terribly serious accident, he flew out through the windshield and was killed. I’m perfectly happy promoting helmets, child seats and any other safety things that human development has brought. (Hey, last few years I have even started using a helmet while skiing which I previously never did other than when doing speedskiing!) And my two boys 20 and 21 are smarter, kinder and harder working kids than what I and my friends ever were at that age. So I doubt that having kept them a bit safer has hurt their development the way that you think!
Now, as for the Sno Runner I have never seen one. Seems fun to try. Check out the Swedish Larven for another example of a very non-traditional snowmobile that you could do a lot of crazy stuff with.
In my Province of Ontario, Canada, the Government requires anyone 18 years and younger to wear a helmet while riding a bicycle. People of the Sikh faith are given an exception, to ride motorcycles with just a turban. Talk about wanting to keep the voters happy.
U named mosta em Jeff w/heavy lawn darts’n 3 wheelers (floatation tire as suspension) as sacrosanct to the parent w/too many kids. These? seemed more for an 007 quick geta way. (Fact a 21 Century movie just had’em in, teen or 20something hero).
Didn’t they ban clackers because they were exploding when kids played with them?
Sold.
Jeff, it would have been nice if you had told us something, anything, about this device. But I guess you wanted to to take the day off and share with us your personal thoughts.And since it’s Christmas, that’s OK.
Beyfon, growing up safe probably didn’t hurt their development, but boy did they miss a lot of fun? They missed teeter-totters, playground merry-go-rounds, high slides, and multiple other adrenaline-inducing activities that determine your courage, guts, whatever that makes life exciting. Seat belts, sure. Helmets when motorcycling, you bet. But I’ll bet you look down on the kids doing both back and front flips on motorcycles and snowmobiles, racing motocross with big powerful bikes, etc. thinking it will “hurt their development”.
Be interesting to see where they are 20 years from now compared to your safely-raised, risk averse sons.
I’m with you, Kenn. We have a “skateboard park” in town, with those crazy dips and such. A young man, doing a “routine” with no protection, landed wrong and was killed. I think “back then”, we all knew someone that got killed,, and quite frankly, made us more careful riders. It’s all how one was raised. Years ago, I had a nephew, city boy, no father, wanted to ride my snowmobile. Never any exposure to anything like that. I said, okay, take it easy now, he assured me he would. I started it, he hopped on, the 1st thing he did was put the throttle to the handlebar, and wiped out. He was okay, but scared him enough, I doubt he tried that again. It’s how I learned, but stayed with it. Growing up, most of us had all kinds of exposure to this kind of stuff. We didn’t have electronic gizmos, THIS was our entertainment, and we knew what could happen. Ambulance chasers and medical professions made a fortune off these things from unqualified riders that lacked common sense, for what ever reason. With the way things are going, nobody will want this or know what to do with it. You needed a shred of mechanical sense to even start this thing. I just don’t see that today.
I remember when I first came to this country, the small town near my university made a point to put wrecked cars when teenagers or drunks got killed in, in full public view downtown for all to see and be warned. A local cop and I were discussing it one day and I said it was morbid, but he corrected me and described it as educational.
These were originally designed by Poulan chain saw co. I had just started working for Sears who was looking at these and helped test in the R&D of it. I believe Sears lawyers advised against it for liability reasons.
I never did manage to ride it for longer than a couple hundred feet, it was hard to get your feet up. Poulan sold the patents to Chrysler who did a nice job redesign ing it
Huh,, no foolin’? Never knew that, and would surprise many that worked making these, I bet. I do know, Honda made a snowmobile prototype, called the “White Fox”, designed by a guy in Greenfield, Wis. that never made it either.
https://www.pinterest.com/pin/96827460719066708/
Wisconsin is the right place for this.
December is the right time to sell it.
Looks like it might be missing a few parts.
I have to comment on all the drinking in the authors childhood ,