Onyx Black is the only color for this rig. I can’t imagine a Summit White or Victory Red Suburban fully outfitted with armor plating by O’Gara Hess & Eisenhardt Armoring Company out of Ohio. Yes, this 1996 Chevrolet Suburban K2500 4×4 is loaded with armor plating, the seller has it posted here on craigslist in Falcon, Colorado, and they’re asking $35,900. Here is the original listing, and thanks to Rocco B. for the tough tip!
The seller’s listing reads like 90% of the infomercials that I see while watching retro TV shows, the ones from the 50s/60s/70s. The ads are aimed squarely at older people, and companies know they scare easily, apparently. Everything is an impending crisis; you’re going to fall, your car is going to break down, you must tell your doctor that you need Zilnaxadroll, etc. I get the seller’s point, though.
This is a troubled world, but sadly, it always has been. The next owner is the only one who can decide whether they need a 30-year-old, nearly 10,000-pound, armor-plated Chevy Suburban to somehow try to get through this troubled world that we live in. In case you were wondering, yes, the tires have built-in run-flat inserts. Here’s what the rear cargo area looks like: it has ample space for supplies, ammo, and several bottles of Nahtraxidrill for that ailment that you need to talk to your doctor about, the one that you didn’t even know you had until you saw that commercial. The exterior looks great in the photos, but they say that there is some hail damage and some clearcoat issues. I wish we knew the history of why this Suburban was created; that would be super interesting. The seller is the second owner and they have had it since 2015.
The interior is beautiful in this eighth-generation Suburban. Chevrolet made this era Suburban from late 1991 for the 1992 model year until the end of 1999 here, and until 2001 in Australia. With only 38,046 miles, this one is barely broken in, which is a bad phrase in this sorry and dangerous world we live in (sorry, I’m sticking with the theme…). The back seat area looks like new, and aside from O’Gara Hess & Eisenhardt armor plating under the sheet metal, this 4×4 3/4-ton Suburban also has a gun safe that can be used to lock up anything you may need in an emergency. Yes, even Snickers bars.
Sadly, the seller didn’t bother to pop the hood to show us the engine. They do show the 2-inch thick door glass in the front two doors, which is cool. I wonder if the power window motors were upgraded or if that wasn’t needed. I have to assume that O’Gara Hess & Eisenhardt Company thinks of everything after being in business for (are you sitting down?) 140 years, and having provided presidential and other armored vehicles since the 1940s! The seller refers to the engine as a 7.3-liter V8, but this should be Chevy’s Vortec 7.4-liter (454-cu.in.) OHV V8 with 290 horsepower and 420 lb-ft of torque when new. This one has an added supercharger, no doubt for the added 5,000-pound weight, along with an MSD ignition and upgraded Brembo brakes.
The transmission in the 2500-series Suburbans would have been the upgraded 4L80-E, a four-speed overdrive automatic able to handle torque up to 440 lb-ft, which automatically churns my brain into wondering about the added supercharger power numbers. I’m assuming that after three decades, everything works as it should. Geo or other GM experts may know more about that transmission. There was also a 4L85-E used on later Suburbans, which was able to handle a 50% bump in torque ratings. The seller says this tough rig runs great, and it also has a new battery. Would any of you have a use for an armored Suburban?
If i was planning on starting a life of crime, i would definitely consider this vehicle.