From an automotive treasure trove near Warrensburg, Missouri comes this collection of classic cars and trucks. The sad and all-too-frequent story of declining health forces the sale of this eclectic collection. The vehicles are not identified in the listing here on Facebook Marketplace so, for entertainment value, I will attempt to identify them without research. Feel free to reward or skewer me in the comments below! Since there are no prices or provenance listed I will also invent details that should not be taken as anything but fiction. Let’s start with the Fitchtional description of this 1973 Plymouth ‘Cuda with the rare factory matching sublime-accented Keystone mags. The original 440 expired long ago, but fear not; a 440 from a 1977 motorhome provides prodigious torque and at least 200 HP.
Fitchtional description: This 1959 Plymouth Belvedere features a three inch chop done by none other than Fred Barris, distant relative of a famous car-chopper. At least three humans were conceived in the back seat, one of whom has avoided prison. Other progeny include dozens of field mice. $3000.
Fitchtional description: Almost as hot as the original Ford Bronco, these first-generation Chevrolet Blazers are arguably more practical, and their shared use of many GM pickup truck parts makes them cheaper to restore. This 1972 model can be yours for $5500. Don’t low ball me; I know what I got!
Fitchtional description: Like, did I leave my comb in your van? This 1970 Ford Econoline van features five-slot mags from the ’70s on the rear and ’80s wheels on the front. The inline six cylinder runs if you pour gas down its throat. $4500
Fitchtional description: This 1969 Plymouth Road Runner convertible packs a 383 cid V8 that runs like the infantry, though only seven cylinders are reporting for duty. Look for rust under that black paint on the lower panels. I saw one of these sell for $89,000 on TV, and I know this one is worth $42,000 all day long. Don’t insult me.
Fitchtional description: This 1955 Packard Clipper has all good glass. Parts or restore, $2100.
Fitchtional description: Ready for your favorite vintage racing event, this Allard draws power from a 331 cid Cadillac V8. $17,500.
Fitchtional description: This 1970 AMC Matador wagon can haul plywood or you-know-what, as the built 390 is no joke. Don’t make your low-ball offer a joke, either. $8500 firm.
Fitchtional description: This 1940 Plymouth Business Coupe gave John Law the business back in the day, and still has a 200 gallon ‘shine tank in the back to prove it. A 1954 Chrysler Hemi V8 replaced the original inline six and it corners like a sprint car on gravel. This piece of illicit history can be yours for $8200. Now, after all that, I’d like to say “Be kind with your comments,” but I’ve invited certain abuse by making this all up so, you know, let fly. Which is your favorite?
After all the crumbling American iron, seeing the random restored Citroen pop up in the collection photos was a bit of a surprise.
I may have been one of the three conceived in the back of the Belvedere??
That’s scary lol. Sometimes parents name their kid after the place of conception. A girl named Electra may be the result of some goings on in the back seat of a Buick Electra. It could also mean somewhere I’ve got a kid named Shadow.
Perhaps Dave Mustaine could provide some insight?
My daughter has no idea how lucky she is to not be named Cordoba or Corinthia (it had leather buckets).
My keystones shed all their chrome also. At least he tried to salvage them with some rattle can paint.
Corroded aluminum would have looked better.
The 59 Plymouth is a “60” The 40 Plymouth Looks More Like A 48 Ford….Maybe if they knew what they had it might be better.
Thanks Sam! I knew I was playing with fire on some of these. Thanks for the eagle eye. Here is a ’40 Plymouth (courtesy of Mecum) for what it’s worth.
Fictional description number 2……..the chop top ’59 Plymouth was a “known” trouble ride, with a bunch of salty lookin’ dudes with greasy hair on the prowl for..what else, Trouble! Just looks like a hoodlum ride.
I didn’t think the ’73 Cuda could see still get the 440.
Nice bunch of untestored old cars captured in “in period” threads.
No, you couldn’t Einstein, but you sure could get one in a ’73 motorhome!
The 440 was still available in the 1973 Fury and Monaco and light trucks. Can’t remember if it was a Road Runner/GTX option.
The 440 was still available in B-body coupes (Satellite/Charger) in 1973-’74, but after that it was only available in 4-door Bs as part of the A38 police package.
The marker lights indicate that the ‘Cuda or Barracuda shown is a 1970 or ’71, so it’s entirely possible it’s a legit U- (4bbl) or V- (6bbl) coded car. The stripe is a very-poor imitation of the 1973-’74 ‘Cuda design; definitely not original or repro.
Albert. Albert Einstein.
Keep the humor alive!
The homegrown stripe on the Barracuda makes it look like a ’73 (or ’74) but the marker lights are ’70-’71 only. Even a Slant Six car from those first two years has some real–if somewhat unwarranted–value. It looks pretty solid, as do most of the cars.
What made my heart skip a beat was that blue ’69 Polara (?) wagon. I *want* it, more than anything else listed. Don’t judge me.
1969 Plymouth Suburban.
I’ll offer $200 for the Volks-Allard.
Aka Bug-atti.
The Matador wagon is intriguing though.
+1 for the Matador…I’m in at $500.00!
Yes very nice collection, the ad has been up 3 weeks, did they sell anything yet?
There was no Matador in 1970. This wagon is a Rebel, but more likely an Ambassador.
Judging by the distance from the back of the front wheel well to the rear edge of the fender I’d say it’s an Ambassador. The Rebel had a four inch shorter wheelbase.
I like all of them but I’d love to own what appears to be a 2CV panel. Another top choice would be the chopped Belvedere, as long as the glass is included. The Matador ‘sleeper’ would be great, too. MO is one state away….hmm.
Is that a Montego four-door hardtop? Pretty rare; doubt anyone is looking for one, tho.